Not Letting Go

Today, I read this beautiful Hughes' poem that perfectly resonates my present feelings. Here it is:


As I Grew Older


It was a long time ago.
I have almost forgotten my dream.
But it was there then,
In front of me,
Bright like a sun--
My dream.
And then the wall rose,
Rose slowly,
Slowly,
Between me and my dream.
Rose until it touched the sky--
The wall.
Shadow.
I am black.
I lie down in the shadow.
No longer the light of my dream before me,
Above me.
Only the thick wall.
Only the shadow.
My hands!
My dark hands!
Break through the wall!
Find my dream!
Help me to shatter this darkness,
To smash this night,
To break this shadow
Into a thousand lights of sun,
Into a thousand whirling dreams
Of sun! 
-Langston Hughes

There were times, I remember, when I felt so inspired that I could take over the world. It was insane the kind of drive I possessed then. It has been ages since I felt like that again. 

This makes me question whether my dream is even good enough to inspire me? Or have I changed? It was another high, working for something with immense passion. I am just 21. Why am I so uninspired? Where is that competitive spirit? Where is that energy?

It is not the time to dwell on the past. I somehow have to revive.. no.. give birth to a new inspiration, new energy, new spirit. I have to work for a dream. I should be grateful that I have a dream. And now that I have, I have to find some way to be blindly passionate. 

Thank you Hughes. You did it again.